


Totally For Work

by PunkPhantomTwin



Series: 100 Kinks Challenge [8]
Category: Psych
Genre: Cliche, Dirty Talk, Fake Dating, Feelings, Fluff, Killer hurts Shawn, M/M, Ouch, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2015-07-08
Packaged: 2018-04-08 07:00:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4295097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PunkPhantomTwin/pseuds/PunkPhantomTwin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shawn and Carlton have to go undercover as a couple in order to weed out a killer targeting gay couples, but it might be difficult with Shawn's crush.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Totally For Work

**Author's Note:**

> Part 8 of the "100 Kinks Challenge" and this challenge was "Romantic Evening"
> 
> I started watching Psych again oh my god Shassie. It's so obvious! This was originally just fluff, but it fit into the kink challenge so well, so there is smut. It may be a little scattershot but I kind of like it. I've also realized that I'm a lot more embarrassed by writing smut then I am reading it.
> 
> This is so fucking cliche, I mean, really. Especially for Shassie.
> 
> Enjoy and remember to review!

A dark haired man stuck his head around the corner, eyes surveying the room. He squinted, noting the meatball sub that McNab was scarfing down, onions laced inside.

“Francine’s out of town, huh?” He muttered.

Looking onward, his eyes stopped on Carlton’s desk. Though the Head Detective wasn’t there, it was strewn with crumpled up paper and pens, an open letter on the side. The pseudo-psychic recognized the signature as Old Sonora’s previous owner and sheriff, Hank Mendel. He gave a soft smile knowing that Carlton was still in touch with his friend.

“Shawn!”

He twirled around, eyes widening as Juliet approached him. Hadn’t she been in the Chief’s office? How did he miss her leaving?

“Hey, Jules,” He waved it off as being distracted, though he knew he would have to work on that. “Are you here to be my replacement Bonnie?”

“What? Oh, right! Gus is out of town for this week, isn’t he?”

“Yeah, on some ‘Pharmaceutical Trip’, whatever that is.” Shawn crossed his arms, face setting into a pout. It was clear to all that he missed being with his best friend.

“Well, I’m sure you’ll find something to do while he’s gone.”

“What am I supposed to do for the next 6 days, 17 hours, and 32 minutes?”

Juliet’s face did not do well to hide the how shocked and impressed she was that he knew exactly how long it would be before Gus got back home, without looking at the time. She should be used to this by now.

“Maybe a job? The Chief sent me to come get you because she needs help on this--” He had already grabbed her arm and started dragging her to the office, his face visibly brighter.

They arrived in the middle of Lassiter commenting on a new case that Chief Vick was apparently not letting him in on.

“I just don’t understand why you won’t tell me the case, if you expect me to work on it.” He was glaring down at the Chief, frustration evident in his voice.

She looked like she was about to retort, but stopped when Shawn came in, seemingly calming down. “Ah, now that Mr. Spencer has joined us, I can tell you the details.”

Shawn gave a fake sniffle. “Awe, you were waiting for me? Shucks, Chief.”

Used to his antics by now, she just rolled her eyes and handed the three of them files on the case.

“Recently, someone or a group of people have been targeting couples that are celebrating something at local five star restaurants, may it be an anniversary or a birthday. The couples go missing for a few days before turning up again…”

Her voice trailed off as they examined the folders, Shawn’s stomach churning at the pictures of couple remains. Though he didn’t want to look too close, he did notice something unique about the couples.

“Chief? These are all… men.”

“Exactly, Mr. Spencer. It seems that they are targeting gay couples.” She seemed to back up a bit, trying to go into her next statement gently, though apprehensively. “Which is where you two come in.” 

All three of their eyes flew up, noticing that she was looking between Shawn and Carlton.

“Us?” They both spoke, their voices significantly higher than usual.

“Yes. You two will go to Bouchon, an upscale French restaurant that’s only a few minutes away, so we can all move in if need be. You’ll arrive at 8:30, going undercover as a couple celebrating your 1 year anniversary.”

Both of their faces were flushed, glancing at each other before jerking there eyes away from each other. Their mouths opened, prepared to argue, but she cut them off with her stern voice.

“It’s fair to say that you have no choice in this as I need you both out there.” With a final nod of acceptance from the two, she turned to Juliet with a sigh of relief. “O‘hara, I’ll need you and a small team nearby. It may be close to the department, but we can’t take any chances.”

“Yes, Chief.”

Listing off a few more details about the victims and the plan, she soon dismissed them and they were all quick to leave.

“So,” Shawn started when the doors closed behind them. “what time do you want me to pick you up, Lassie?” He batted his eyelashes, the older man groaning and slumping away to his desk.

“Shawn…” Juliet’s voice was laced with concern as she eyed her friend, and he seemed to know exactly what she was going to say.

“It’ll be fine, Jules.” He headed toward the front of the department, her following close behind.

“Will you? I mean, you’re fine hiding your crush on a regular day, but what about when you both have to pretend to be in love?”

“At least I won’t have to pretend,” He joked, but he hid the pain behind it. She noticed.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

They stopped in front of his motorcycle, Shawn putting his hands on her shoulders to comfort her.

“Trust me, Jules. I’ll be okay.” He bent down to kiss her cheek before hopping on. “Thanks for worrying about me.” They waved and he was gone, surely going to pick out a nice outfit for the night.

 

Juliet found the Head Detective grumbling at his desk, scribbling on some paper. She caught a few words like “damn”, “Spencer”, and “romantic.”

“Hey, Carlton.” He barely glanced up at her, muttering a greeting. “Do you need any help before tonight?”

His head snapped up, a snarl on his lips. “Are you implying that I can’t go on a date without help?”

She held up her hands in defense. “Well, you don’t date very often and this is with Shawn… and you aren’t very romantic anyway.”

He looked like he was about to argue, but his head just fell. “Okay, fine.”

Eyes widening, she smiled before sitting on his desk, clapping her hands together.

“Okay, so, when dating a guy--”

“Whoa, O’Hara!” His head shot up, hands moving to a defensive position. “I’m not actually dating Spencer!”

“Yeah, but you have to seem like it if you want to catch this guy.”

Carlton tried to think of a way that he could tell her to go away and she could not be right. But she was right. Damn it.

Taking his sigh of resignation, she jumped closer to his side, grabbing onto his arm.

“Okay, so, when dating a guy, you need to touch him a lot. Flirtatiously.” He went to interrupt but a glare from her stopped him. “A lot. And compliment him! Make sure he knows how much you like him. And don’t talk about your work so much. No one wants to hear about the dead clown story.”

“But--”

“No.”

He pouted, puffing air, his arms crossed, muttering “This sounds like what my marriage councilor told me…” She gave him a ’duh’ look.

Maybe this would turn out better than Shawn thought.

 

It was 8 o’clock when he reached Shawn’s, er, living quarters. He stood in front of the door for almost 10 minutes before finally knocking, the door opening immediately after. Carlton stood there blankly.

Hair trimmed, jaw shaved, suit dry cleaned. Shawn looked like something out of a fairytale. And, judging from the other man’s eyes wandering over him, Shawn was thinking the same thing. He was suddenly happy that he wasn’t wearing his work clothes like he usually did on dates.

“Hey,” Shawn’s voice was hoarse, causing him to cough, ears blushing red. “Lassie. Hey, Lassie. Are you ready for our, um, date?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m ready, yeah, totally.” Carlton moved aside, waiting for him to close the door. They shuffled out to the car, Carlton subconsciously opening the door for him. Their eyes met for a second before tearing their gazes away, settling into the seats.

It was a tense 10 minute drive where no one spoke, though they glanced at each other every few seconds. They didn’t put the ear pieces in until they reached the parking lot, making sure they could hear Juliet before they went in.

“Hello, do you have a reservation?”

“Yes. 8:30, Lassiter.” Shawn waited behind him, observing the area to see if he could spot anyone or anything suspicious, recalling what the file had said about the host having two fathers, the chief and Carlton thinking that could have something to do with the murders, but Shawn wasn’t convinced.

“Ah, yes, right this way Mr. Lassiter.” 

They followed the man to their booth, still looking around for other suspects or anyone else who looked suspicious.

“Here you are, gentlemen. Your waitress will be with you shortly.” Shuffling into their seats across from each other, they gave the man small nods before awkwardly settling into silence.

“Talk to each other!” Juliet’s voice filled their ears, making them both wince at the momentary feedback. “Make it look like a real date!”

“You’re right, Jules.” Shawn leaned forward on his elbows, a mischievous grin on his face. “Boxers or briefs?”

She groaned as Carlton grabbed his wrist, yanking him slightly toward him, glaring at the cheeky look on his face.

“I always took you as the rough type, but you could at least wait until we get home.”

“Listen here, Spencer--”

“Relax, Lassie, I’m just trying to get the date started. Y’know, making it look like we actually like each other.” He gave Carlton a pointed look.

He sighed, loosening his grip on the man’s wrist.

“Fine,” Carlton groaned, pulling his hand back and grumbling under his breath just as their waitress arrived. Her nametag said ‘Wendy’ and they both recognized her from the suspect list, as she had been working every night a couple disappeared from the restaurant. He remembered seeing her around sometimes with her boyfriend down at the smoothie shop. Though they were usually a different man every few weeks.

As she took their drink order, and Shawn got them the scallop trio appetizer (“We’re not paying for it anyway!”), the waitress was blatantly keeping her eyes on Shawn, pushing her chest out. 

She shook her hips as she walked away, leaving Carlton steaming in his seat.

“What’s wrong, Lassie?” His face was scrunched in confusion, and Carlton couldn’t detect any insincerity in his voice.

“I just think that, if we’re undercover as a… couple… then you shouldn’t be flirting with the waitress, a suspect, if you‘ve forgotten.”

His eyebrows furrowed. “Flirting? With her?” Shawn’s face suddenly lit up, a grin spreading across his face. “Are you jealous?”

“What? That’s--”

He was cut off when she came back, setting down their wine and scallops. “Are you ready to order?” Her voice was entirely too provocative to be asking about a food order.

“Yes, we are! I will have the…” He squinted as he looked at the menu again, finding what he had decided on. “shallot-glazed rack of lamb. Medium rare, please. And my date here,” he reached out to squeeze Carlton’s hand. “will have the grilled wagyu flat iron steak.” Her smile dropped, eyes shifting to him, scowling down at the man before repeating the order, lips tight, and leaving.

Carlton’s gaze was still on their hands as Shawn leaned in. 

“She might spit in your food.”

 

The next hour and a half was spent discussing past adventures, both before and after they met, giggling and snorting as they got progressively more drunk, the wine bottle almost empty.

They had completely forgotten that they were undercover and that it wasn’t a real date. And Juliet just let them be, sure that one of them had a good idea of what was happening.

Laughing over their desert, a lemon upside down cake with blueberry ice cream, while Shawn told Carlton about the time he snuck liquor into the salted caramel ice cream when he worked at Ben and Jerry’s, knowing that his coworker always snuck some during the work day.

“So there he is, stumbling around, and he fell right in some little girl’s ice cream.” Chortling loudly, they leaned over the table, their hands still together, Carlton squeezing Shawn’s a bit while he laughed.

“That’s awful!”

“I know! But it’s not as bad as the dead clown!”

They had to bite their lips to keep their laughter from attracting other’s attention. It eventually bubbled down, Carlton’s thumb rubbing across Shawn’s hand.

“We should probably leave.” 

Shawn sighed. “Yeah…”

They stood, stepping toward the door, having already paid and left their tip. As they went through the parking lot, Shawn noticed someone out of the corner of his eye. Someone familiar. 

Swiftly, he grabbed him by the lapels of his jacket and pulled him into his chest, their lips meeting. Carlton barely hesitated before pushing back, jaw dropping open to get more access to Shawn. His hands suddenly came up, gripping Shawn by the elbows and backing him up to his car. One hand moved to his bottom, the other pinning his wrist to the car.

Carlton abruptly fell to the ground, a heavy smack sounding as he fell. Shawn was breathing heavy, spit dripping from his mouth as Wendy the Waitress stood behind the fallen detective, wielding a hefty frying pan next to a taller man who looked similar to her holding a butcher knife..

“The Waitress, huh? Yeah, I can see it.” He held a finger to his head, even as he leaned against the car for breath. “You see all these couples, being happy being themselves, but ‘themselves’ doesn’t exactly agree with your views. Why can these people be happy in love if you can’t be. After all, your last few boyfriends turned out to be gay, and that just ruined it for you.”

He remembered seeing a man who used to be romantic with her in the smoothie shop with another man, kissing and being sweet. The first victims.

“Your brother, here, was happy to help you get revenge, and being a butcher just helped you carve them up.. Damn, you are insane.”

Her grip faltered a bit, but it was back soon as she lifted the pan over her head. “Pretty smart. But they deserved it, I was just helping them get to hell that much faster. After what they did to me, they all deserved to be mutilated. That‘s what they did to my heart, anyway. But, hey, you‘ll see them soon enough.” She went to bring it down, but something pushed her off her center, the pan slamming into Shawn’s head, him blacking out.

 

When he came to, Shawn realized that he wasn’t in the parking lot. He was on some couch that took him a minute to remember. Lassiter’s apartment!

The man in question entered the room, coming from a door behind him, holding an ice bag to his head.

“Good to see you’re awake.” He sat next to him while he leaned up.

“What happened?” He groaned, hissing when he rubbed the top of his head. Though it did feel better, noticing a first aid kit on the coffee table, another ice bag nearby. He saw Carlton’s hand twitch when he made a noise of pain.

“She got the jump on us, though I was never fully knocked out. I grabbed her ankles once I came back to my senses, but she got you on the way down. Juliet arrived before I could get a could whack at them.” He looked away, a murderous look in his eye.

“Mm, yeah. I can feel that.” He chuckled dryly. “I’m surprised she even got the drop on us.”

“Well, we were very drunk and… preoccupied.” They both averted their gazes, ears burning red.

“Y-yeah, about that…” Shawn stammered out, rubbing the back of his neck.

“You don’t have to say anything, Spencer. We were both drunk and just trying to weed out the murderers.” He wouldn’t meet his eyes when Shawn looked up.

“That’s not only why I did it.”

Carlton’s head snapped up, their eyes finally locked.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Carlton was the first to move, diving forward on top of him, hands gripping his face. He kneeled over the younger man, Shawn’s legs stretched out between his while they kissed. His fingers slid up to his hair, ruffling and scratching through it, a raspy moan coming from him.

Spit dripped down between their mouths, Shawn’s hands scratching down his clothed back. A rumble sounded from him, Carlton moving to his neck, growling “Fuck, Spencer,” at the desperate sounding noises.

A hand gripping onto his hair, he yanked Shawn’s head to the side, biting and kissing and licking at his neck. His hips involuntarily jerked upward as Carlton marked him.

“W-who knew that y-you were so po-possessive, Lassie?” 

He yelped at a particularly hard bite.

“Who knew that you were so noisy?”

Fumbling with his shirt, Carlton slid down, grinning cutely before yanking it open. While his hands slid down his bare chest, he suddenly looked very shy.

“So, which one of us is the guy?”

Shawn blinked.

“We’re both guys.”

“The guy in this, um...”

Shawn’s face broke into a toothy grin, hands moving around to grip Carlton’s bottom, squeezing.

“You be the *guy* and I’ll be the /guy/.”

His hips grinded upward, grabbing onto his shoulders to pull his face down again. Carlton moved to rub his back, starting tenderly but it didn’t take long for him to claw the button up off, pushing it to the couch.

Unbuttoning Carlton’s shirt, he pulled back slightly when he was halfway down, a bark of laughter stumbling out.

“Lassie, you shaved! Did you forget what I told you about ladies loving the sternum bush?” His chest still had hair on it, but it looked as if it was growing back from being recently trimmed. He ran his hands down it slowly, smirking as Carlton’s eyes closed.

One hand continuously rubbing his chest, the other moved to push his shirt off, much more gentler than Carlton had been. And he seemed to realize that too when Shawn moved to gently kiss his collar bone and throat.

He purred quietly as Shawn nuzzled into his neck, but their content didn’t last long, as Carlton was quick to push him back down, his head crashing into the arm of the couch.

Wincing as Carlton inclined down, biting his shoulder, Shawn sniggered. “A little impatient, aren’t we Lassie?”

He leaned back, a frustrated look on his face as he grinded his hips into him.

“Spencer, this has been coming on for years. We have both been waiting for this for a while so will you please just shut up.”

Shawn whimpered softly, nodding while his mouth tried to form some kind of word, but nothing came out.

The head detective was quick to yank at his belt, barely getting it unbuckled before he slid the psychic’s pants off and threw the pair to the floor, leaving him in his Batman boxers, a very obvious tent showing through.

His hand shot out abruptly, palming him through his underwear, eliciting more enticing noises from his mouth. 

Shawn was apparently very vocal in bed.

When his hands pulled at the elastic, he called out “Carlton!”, arching his back up and Carlton instinctively bent down to claim his mouth again, sliding the underwear down his legs.

Once they were kicked off, he pushed back slightly to growl against his throat, grasping his length in his hand.

“Say my name, Spencer.”

Grabbing onto Carlton’s hair, Shawn whined when he started moving, massaging him.

“Carlton!”

He squeezed his cock harder, pulling and rubbing it.

“Mmm, Shawn.” His hand stroked the full length of Shawn, jerking him and rubbing his thumb roughly over his tip.

“Carlton!”

Grinning wickedly, Carlton removed his hand, Shawn’s length curving up to his stomach, both slicked up.

“Carlton, please…” He moaned, trying to yank him closer, fiddling with the only garments separating them.

“What do you want, Shawn? Tell me.”

He scowled up at Carlton, shoving his hand into the remaining pants, causing him to double over, jaw fallen open. “Fuck me, Carlton!”

Carlton’s impatience seemed to transfer over to Shawn, who was now pulling the older man’s pants down his legs, kicking them off into the floor before grabbing his ass and pulling him flush against him.

He sucked and licked at his chest, where he was pushed against him, leaving a few hickeys around before Carlton finally got his bearings back.

“Let’s, ugh, move to the bed,” he went to get up but Shawn pulled him back down, grinding up against him.

“I don’t think I can wait that long, Lassie.”

Though his movements were clouding his mind a bit, Carlton was able to groan out, “The lube is in there,” causing Shawn to stop completely and push him back before making a run for the bedroom.

He sat there for a second, leaning his head onto the arm of the couch, trying to calm himself down. Once his breathing was somewhat normal and he had fully assessed the situation(which surprisingly only took one minute considering he had been running on pure instinct up until this moment and he was about to screw around with Shawn Spencer, even if he had known this would happen eventually), he pushed himself up and headed to his room, stopping in the doorway when he heard Shawn’s moans again.

He nearly fell to the floor when he spotted Shawn bent over, ass in the air, face in the pillows with his fingers playing around his asshole, the index finger pumping inside himself, very evidently slicked up with the lube from the open bottle on the bedside stand. Carlton ignored the drawers around his room stuck open, their contents strew across the floor from Shawn’s search, and went straight for the bed.

Shawn apparently didn’t hear him through his moaning of Carlton’s name and nicknames, though they were muffled into the pillows. Swiftly pushing his own boxers off and into the floor, he crawled up behind him and pulled his fingers away.

Eyes snapping open, Shawn went to sit up, but Carlton’s other hand push his upper body back down into the bed.

He reached over to lather his fingers in lube before throwing it back on the table, one hand moving around to graze over Shawn’s hardness, the other gently pushing against the already slicked up hole.

“You started without me, Shawn.” He pushed his index finger in, his other hand beginning to leisurely stroke his equally slicked cock, Shawn bitting into the pillow. “That’s not very nice.” He pumped his finger in, slowly picking up the pace while he pushed it into Shawn.

“Ah, sorry L-Lassie!” He tried to thrust into Carlton’s hand faster, his own hands gripping onto the bed frame by his head.

“Should just leave you. After all, you don’t need me. You don’t need my cock.” His hands started to move faster, pushing another finger into him.

“N-no, Lassie! Mm, need you! Want you! A-always wanted you-Ah!” Carlton removed his hands, reaching for a condom in the bedside drawer that still had its contents in it.

“Is that so?”

“Yes! Been thinking about this for years, since you first manhandled me into that police car…” He bit back down into the pillow, thrusting against the mattress until he felt something against his ass again. Something bigger than their fingers.

They both groaned when Carlton pushed in, fingers digging into Shawn’s sides. 

“Me too,” he grunted.

“Hm?”

“Been thinking about this for long time.” He started a slow pace, rocking into him gently. “When my old partner got replaced, mm, I wanted to just, ugh, push you against the interrogation room mirror and teach you some respect.”

“R-really?” 

“Thought you were a stupid kid, just there to mess with me.” He slowly began picking up speed.

“Ugh, not really something you w-wanna tell someone when y-you’re fucking them for the first time.” Carlton thrusted in particularly harder as he ended his sentence.

“But then,” He continued, as if he had been ignoring him, “you saw me at my lowest. And, instead of, mm, humiliating me, you helped me with the astronomer case. Even made me think I solved it.”

“You knew about that-AH!” Carlton moved his arms around Shawn’s chest, pulling him up until his back was flush with his chest, pushing into him deeper.

“And you’re always on me, during your ‘episodes’. I thought I would lose control every time you touched me. Wanted to make you feel the same way you made me feel.” Shawn’s head fell back, his own hand pumping his throbbing length. “Do you feel what you do to me, Shawn?”

“Mmm, Lassie. E-every time I’m like this, it, ah, always you… Never thought of anyone else since, mm, we started working together.” Carlton’s hand came over Shawn’s, helping him pump himself.

He bit down on Shawn’s shoulder when the psychic came, coating their hands in his cum, until a few thrusts later Carlton let go inside of him, grabbing his chest again and holding him to him while he slowly eased his thrusting to a gentle rocking. They both fell forward, covered in sweat and cum, breathing heavily until their heart rates calmed down.

Once they had cooled down, the head detective eased out of him, heading across the hall to dispose of the condom and grab some wet washcloths. He returned to find Shawn on his back, eyes closed, a small content smile on his face. Carlton began to wash off his chest, hands, and waist, Shawn purring contently as he did so. 

After the cum had been washed away, one of Shawn’s eyes flicked open. “Shouldn’t I wash you off?”

“I already took care of that while I was in the bathroom.”

Shawn rolled his eyes and rolled over. “I guess I’ll do it in the morning, when we shower before work.”

He sat down on the bed next to him, moving away the dirty covers. “Your staying?”

Sitting back up, Shawn turned to him, a nervous glint in his eyes. “I mean, if you want me to go, I’ll go, but I thought I’d stay. Unless--!” Carlton sighed but grabbed his arms and pulled him close as he lay down, holding Shawn against him.

“I guess it couldn’t hurt.” Shawn’s face broke into a toothy grin. “What?”

“Your heart hearts me.”

 

Meanwhile, back in the surveillance van, Juliet sat there, hand covering her mouth, her own earpiece thrown to the floor, while the others were on Carlton’s coffee table.

**Author's Note:**

> DON'T WORRY! Jules only heard the confession and the beginning of the making out. She's just been in shock for that long and didn't want to pick up the earpiece again!
> 
> Also I didn't check for errors before posting because I'm in a bit of a hurry so I'll go back over it later.
> 
> So I'm getting into the kink challenge and I've started to realize that I suck at writing smut. Sorry!


End file.
